To the Youth Leader on the Edge of Burnout,
Don’t quit! We NEED you. God doesn’t need you to do this mighty work, but your neighbor does—me, the mom of ninth and sixth graders. We can’t do it alone, my husband and I. We need the church; we need YOU.
As parents, we need someone who understands our kids, who cares about them, who listens to them, and well, who likes them when we don’t. We need the expertise of your cultural exegesis: the movies you’ve seen that I won’t, the phrases your smile laughs at without the confusing wrinkled eyes we respond with, the metaphors that aren’t as ancient as the teaching tools we use.
We need you to continue steadfast in God’s Word, held in Him, resting securely in your identity as His Beloved, so that our kids see that people they admire aren’t merely self-confident, but Christ-confident. We need you to be visible and regular in your worship attendance, communion participation, and an active partaker in the fellowship of believers God has placed us in together, so that our kids know that this, that church, that faith, all matter to people they look up to beyond their families.
We need you to keep going when you’re tired so they learn to buck up. We need you to try and fail and try and a try and fail and try something new so that they will have the courage to try things they don’t already know they’re good at. We need you to keep going when you don’t see the fruit of your labor because we do: even when we forget to tell you thanks.
We need you to admit mistakes, doubt and confusion. This gives a chance for you to model confession and absolution. As you and teens investigate faith questions, they will learn to be lifelong learners and know that their questions are safe, not scary. We need you to surround them in prayer because God’s will is better than our will for them.
So, how? How do you keep going when you’re on the edge of burnout?
Well, as a DCE, here are my pro-tips and hacks:
- Spend time alone with God every day in His Word and be regular in worship to feed your soul, not to research and work.
- Surround yourself with friends outside of work!
- Rest. Nap, eat, drink water, exercise, get, keep, stay healthy!
- Keep working. You are stronger than you think, more extroverted than you realize, and have more energy and capacity than you have come close to touching.
- Reach out. Let us pray for you, too. Tell us what our kids are doing well. Let us in on what you’re learning together.
- Don’t let my emergency be what pulls you away from your Sabbath. Everyone wants you to have a healthy balance. No one wants you to have it on their dime. Protect your Sabbath rest. When you’re working, do it with all of your might, as for God not for men.
- Laugh. Laugh with me at my kid, laugh at me with kid. I won’t parent with shame: I’ll know that life is truly funny and a God who made giraffes can make me giggle at the Utah Fit Check and my kids roll their eyes at my mom jeans. Laugh at movies and books and with friends I’ll never meet. Laugh with your co-workers and pastors. I want to know that you’re happy, healthy, secure, and have community.
Please, don’t quit. If you’re about to burnout, take a break, use your vacation, take a weekend off (even THE BIG WEEKEND: IF you NEED to.) But come back! Pray, and let God fill your heart, so that your love for Him overflows into my needy, precious, beloved children, to this next generation, to the saints that will come after them, for Jesus’ sake!
Thank you!
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